Internet cafe chronicles: Cafe Etiquette

Game addiction can sometimes cause people to do outrageously violent or murderous) things. Most of the time, though, it just makes me shake my head.

I managed a computer rental cafe for two years, and was a regular customer of other cafes for a longer time prior to that. I prefer to work as part of the staff because I believed in being hands-on when it comes to business. During that time, I have come across customers whose personalities range from very friendly to ‘spoiled-as-hell’, and while they strike me as very weird, they don’t think of themselves the same way.

If you are a gamer or a regular customer at an internet café, please take some time to read this list. If you’re guilty of any of the following, you can probably be assured that the owners and regulars of your usual internet cafe hangout already have a nickname for you.

1. Take a bath

Yes, take a bath. You might laugh and ask me why I have to point it out since bathing and being clean is a priority for most people, but unfortunately, not everyone has gotten that memo. There are many people who start their game playing without taking a bath. We know thanks to the unanimous decision made by our noses. We would understand if they were kids, but, good heavens, these are grown teenagers and adults!

Look, I know you guys are excited to play, talk to your friends, watch stuff on YouTube or do whatever it is that has brought you to the shop. It is also none of my business how many times you bathe (or don’t bathe) in a day (or week), but you should really spare a thought for other customers. How you treat your body is really none of our concern, but if I’m the owner of that shop and your lack of hygiene is practically physically attacking my customers, you bet your levels it’s my concern.

2. This is not a daycare center

I need to have a serious talk with whoever started the idea that internet cafes are the equivalent of modern playgrounds. Contrary to popular belief, an internet café, especially one with very active gamers is not the place you want to leave your child in.

Gamers are a subspecies of humanity who may have a rather colorful vocabulary that surfaces when they are provoked, excited or agitated. It is not the kind of language you would want to expose your child to. There are times when there will be arguments and teasing that involves name-calling and cursing. Although I must stress that not all gamers or internet cafes are like this, I must also point out that such environment in an internet cafe is usually unavoidable.

Also, an internet cafe is not a place where you can leave a child to run around by himself. There are other customers that may be bothered by your kid’s presence, and there are definitely expensive things that he might break.

We have no qualms with parents bringing your kids along. For all we know, it may be inevitable for you to take them with you. That is fine for as long as 1) you can take care of them and 2) you won’t expect us to watch them. Please do not drop off your kids in the shop and expect the staff to keep an eye on them. Seriously, that’s not our job.

3. When we say “rent”, it doesn’t mean it’s yours