5 things every laowai gamer needs to learn about PC gaming in China

The life of a gamer in China is different from those of gamers in most other countries. So as an act of charity and goodwill, I have decided share my knowledge and make the transition a little easier for you. Don’t worry, you’re welcome.

1) Patience is essential

The internet in China is a tempestuous mistress. If you are looking for reliability, speed and ease of use, you came to the wrong place. According to China Cache, the average internet speed in China is a sluggish 3.25 mbps, which is slow by anyone’s standards. In my experience, connections can break at any time, even in major cities like Shanghai and Beijing.

Let’s not forget the Great Firewall either, which blocks sites like the IMDB along with Facebook, and makes Google unusable. What’s worse is that it makes connecting to servers outside of China a nightmare, which means no online gaming for you!

Running a game of Call of Duty and connecting to an American or European server just isn’t going to happen, at least not with any reliability. Even with a top of the range VPN, you are not going to have the reliability you need to play at your best.

And so we need patience, we need to let the speed of the internet become inconsequential. We must laugh at our ridiculously poor kill/death scores and put it down to lag. For someone like me, this is quite a handy excuse sometimes. Instead of raging against a treacle-slow Steam download bar, savor the wait. Enjoy the game more because of it.

Oh yeah and don’t lose your mind when your packages are absorbed by China’s customs office.

See: My China console gaming nightmare

2) The art of the hunt

Sometimes you need an English version; there’s just no other option. Maybe it’s because your operating system died, your computer exploded, or your PC decided it can only speak Chinese. Whatever the reason, you need to hunt down that all-important English software, and you need it now!

The first time you embark on this epic mission, your hopes will be high. Surely, in a city of multiple millions, finding an English copy of Windows 7 won’t be too tough? You naive fool.

He’s out there… somewhere