If you're one of these 4 types of gamers, shoot yourself

We gamers can be a united bunch. We made Microsoft go back on its ghastly idea for the digital future of gaming, we show our love to old school games in the hopes of them getting resurrected on Kickstarter, and we’re a pretty welcoming lot.

Well, except to some of our own. While we might be united by events, situations, and the kind of games we like, not all gamers are born equal. And by that I mean, not all gamers are born equally irritating. Therefore, it is in public interest that I present to you the four kinds of gamers who should take an arrow to the knee. Or even better, to the face:

1. Completionists

Everyone knows someone like this. From always bragging about how he or she managed to scour every single achievement in every game played, to dodging a billion lighting bolts in Final Fantasy X and doing every single side-quest in Skyrim, these guys never shut up about their virtual successes. They even use tools like Instagram to further showcase their accomplishments. No surprise then, that the mainstream takes one look at them and labels every gamer as “a loser”.

(See: Final Fantasy X Remastered review: Spira’s looking goooooood)

Favorite genres: role-playing games, strategy, anything to feed a good OCD complex.

Suggested solutions: when faced with completionists, talk about games they’re unfamiliar with. This should shut them up long enough for you to escape being bored to death.

2. Sadists

A throwback from the days of super-tough NES games, the sadist has newfound prominence thanks to games like Dark Souls, Duck Tales: Remastered, and Ikaruga. They’re the sort who believe that running stark naked across Drangleic is a sign of manliness, and feel that Iron Man mode in XCOM is something every game should have. Mutter the words “easy difficulty” in their presence and you’ve done worse than cursing their mothers. You’ll either find them worshipping at the altar of From Software or bitching on gaming forums about how checkpoints and auto-saves are the work of the devil.

(See: 5 ways to not be a quitter in Dark Souls II)

Favorite genres: action, platformer, bullet hell, anything that makes normal gamers throw a controller at the screen in disgust.