Entrepreneur porn is fine, but remember that it’s just porn

Last month, after Ali Mese’s inspirational essay about entrepreneurship went viral, my colleague Daniel wrote a piece in defense of it and of ‘entrepreneur porn’ in general. And while I agree with him that entrepreneur porn is necessary, I think it’s also important to point out just how accurate that term really is.

Entrepreneur porn is a tongue-in-cheek term for essays like Mese’s. They detail the hardships of living the startup life: the family and friends who don’t ‘get it’, the long hours, the intra-team squabbles, etc. But they almost always end on an inspirational high note. Mese’s piece, for example, ends his story with him sipping a Mojito at a beautiful beachside resort in Thailand:

An image from Mese’s piece

In his piece, Mese says he’s not selling a dream, but he is. And that’s OK! Running a startup is hard, and inspirational this-is-tough-but-there’s-light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel pieces can help give founders the will to keep on chugging when they’ve only had three hours of sleep and there’s 40 hours of work that needs doing in the next 20 hours.

But with that said, remember that ‘entrepreneur porn’ stories are like actual porn: they’re not a reflection of what usually happens in reality.

For obvious reasons, I don’t want to get too deep into a discussion of pornography, but I think it’s an apt analogy. Yes, the people in these films are having sex, and yes regular people could do the exact same thing. But generally speaking, we don’t. Real-life sex is often very different from what’s portrayed in pornography. When the cable guy comes, he just fixes the cable.

Entrepreneur porn is similarly unrealistic. Could you found a startup and end up on a beach in Thailand sipping a Mojito someday? Sure! And it’s good to be reminded of that every now and then. But is that what happens most of the time in real life? No. Most startups fail. Statistically speaking, your startup journey is probably more likely to end up back in your parents’ house than at some beautiful beachside resort.

This is not to say that you shouldn’t do a startup, of course. But you should go in with your eyes open, and I think that means understanding that entrepreneur porn isn’t necessarily a reflection of the real entrepreneurial experience. It means understanding that doing a startup is usually a high-risk, high-reward proposition.

The problem with entrepreneur porn is that actual risk isn’t sexy, so risk generally gets downplayed. Entrepreneur porn is heavy on suffering, yes, but that’s all part of the romance. It paints the picture of someone who’s willing to work hard and sacrifice and if you just work hard enough for long enough, boom: beachside Mojito time.

But the truth is that it’s possible (and not uncommon) for you to work really hard, sacrifice a lot, and then still totally fail.

Having failed at a startup project of my own, I do want to emphasize that failure isn’t the end of the world. I think a lot of the people who do startups and fail don’t regret their choices at all. But even so, you should go into your startup understanding that entrepreneur porn isn’t reflective of real life. The beach Mojito is a dream, and not everyone gets it. You really could fail. If you truly understand that and you still want to go all-in, go for it.

Note: we’re collecting inspirational and not-so-inspirational stories of startup failure. Want to share yours? Email editors@techinasia.com.